Photo: Patricia Foster Photo: © Patricia Foster McKenley

As individuals, we are ALL created uniquely beautiful. Some of us have gentle dispositions and are therefore misunderstood. Some of us are extremely sensitively wired and are therefore misunderstood. Some of us will NEVER fit into the mould of acceptable looks, or acceptable past times. It’s about having patience with and being accepting of others, instead of demonising them…because they are not like you!

Some of us may not have explored communication tools that can best express our thoughts or feelings, so may have difficulty in responding to harsh words or criticism, or are unable to articulate the inner pain connected to these harsh words. Speaking out against harsh, critical words may therefore be a huge challenge.
Some of us may feel unsupported, because we are unable to find the right person to express our innermost thoughts and feelings to, without the fear of our expressed feelings being thrown back in our faces.

There is a saying “hurt people hurt people”. Research has shown that those who are unhappy within, or are in pain themselves lash out or bully others, therefore hurting their intended target too.

I performed poetry at a recent ‘Loose Muse’ women’s writing event and a courageous young lady shared her own, deeply personal experiences of being bullied and subsequently wanting to take her own life. She mentioned also that in the area of south London where she resides, suicides among teenagers, in particular GCSE and A Level students were at a ridiculously high number. This was not just due to the pressures of life, but also about how some are made to feel by harsh comments and treatments by others.

Today, I read a Facebook post, which outlined the last Tweet posted by a young man, tormented over the years about his sexuality. He was commonly referred to as “a loser, freak and fag” and used this to describe himself in his last Twitter message. He felt he had done the world an injustice and therefore took his life.

Without the right support and understanding from others, when will people cease to remove their inner pain, torment and feelings of being misunderstood by taking their own lives?

Some of us will never be accepted, because we are moulded and act differently.

How can those of us who are emotionally stronger step in to help prevent bullying and help support and encourage those who are being bullied or misunderstood?

In my workshops and through my writing I have focussed on this, as I have also been bullied and victimised by others. I therefore choose to use my art and holistic and well-being tools to help stand up to this. Writing and coaching can be useful ways to express pain, as well as feel accepted and valued within.

© Patricia Foster McKenley 2013